Monday, July 6, 2015

4 painfully slow trail miles with Lucy. She loves to be out but it's too warm for her to keep up... Her runs are limited to under 5, in the shade, on cooler days.

My feet are still tender from Saturday's long run. While it's "coming back", it still hurts. This is probably the best I've felt, any year training. I am doubtful and hopeful of this year's races.  It is a strange thing when you've been fighting a broken state for so long... and suddenly someone fixes what is wrong. I want to be optimistic but now I question what my potential is. This is new territory to me.

My body was on the trail but my mind is on my list of tasks. Being responsible to guide a young person's entire future is a weight! I question if I'm the right person to help our girls; yet, I know no one loves and cares for them more. I have their best interests at heart and I do my best to help my husband and girls. I still want to curl up at times but that doesn't help anything.

I contemplate Jillian's college schedule as I think of her personality, her disposition, the college success coach's words, the high school counselor's concerns... Why can't this just be easy...?

I contemplate tomorrow's run and the increase in miles, this week. I will switch to miles on the Yellow Trail. I'm ready.


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