I knew my foot was sore after Friday's miles. Saturday my ankle was sore. I opted to tape, ibuprofen & run my race, Sunday, anyways. I struggled & I'm paying for it, now. My ankle & top of my foot have been swollen & extremely tender. Compression helps, temporarily. There is no bruising but there is no flexion, either. I have a 5K, this Saturday; but I don't see how this will be possible. I will focus on healing & once again getting my mileage back up for next month's 1/2 marathon in Cleveland. I doubt I will be ready for a 50K in September. I may just have to do another 1/2 at Woodstock then my full in Detroit. It's not the end of the world but I don't know of anyone that gets hurt more than me...

Call him a glutton for punishment but Jim offered to come with me, again, for the last of my failed miles, yesterday.

A FB friend posted this article.  3 Running-Form Tips to Make You Faster  I read & tried.

EPIC! I was amazed at how loose my hips felt! I was cruising!!! SO much better than earlier!

True Sarah-fashion: hurt my ankle; but I didn't realize it until, later. Started running "cold" & "fast".

Gimping today & planning tomorrow's 1/2 marathon. I suspect Ibuprofen will be part of my breakfast.

Ate some tangerines this morning before my run. I got in my own head, today. It wasn't good. I did 12 of my 16 miles-- & they were pretty rough. At 81* I was toast. I don't know how my fellow runners run in this heat! Bleh! After it cools, I figured I'd try to get my last 4, this evening with Lucy: good for her/good for me. I literally broke down & cried, today. I felt like a wimp & barked at Jim. He was talking about shirt designs & designing & making my own water/hydration vest. I just STOPPED. "I can NOT talk about this right now. It is taking everything I have to be out, here... I don't know what's wrong with me..." then I proceeded to cry & heave along the trail. It was lovely... & I felt like a jerk... I apologized repeatedly... but it was everything to be moving- not holding a conversation, about what else I need to be doing, too. :( I FEEL physically sick & drained. I woke this way. I don't suspect it was the heat as much as it was myself. This is where my insecurities stem from-- a bomb run following any ego building runs, prior. IF, IF, IF I could get my nutrition nailed down... life would be better...

If, if, if I could control my mind-- well-- that would perfect. Wouldn't it?

I worked, last night, came home, ate & stayed up to watch an Adam Sandler movie. I KNEW I wouldn't wake up early to run but was OK with it. I need to get acclimated to the heat for some pretty warm races coming up, soon. I was so out of it, I forgot to take caffeine. I negatively questioned if I could get it done but brought none with me. (I take caffeine pills. I don't drink coffee, tea or colas- just can't choke the tastes.) Jim rode his bike & we did 3-ish mile loops on the Brown trail at Oak Openings because it has a lot of shade. It made it tolerable & the parts with no shade were REALLY hot! I DID take my inhaler & I suspect that is what carried me through. My strategy was 2 small tangerines for breakfast & a Tailwind drink at every mile. It worked! 7 miles at a moderate pace-- done!

(I look like I have old lady shoes! I promise they are Newtons.)

Do you remember that moment when you called yourself a runner? I had been running for a few years but didn't feel comfortable calling myself a runner. Going from being a power lifter to a runner, I didn't have the runner's physique, so I usually dressed in baggy men's clothing. Since I became an INKnBURN ambassador, I've embraced the title of "runner" mostly because I'm wearing beautifully designed clothes that fit so much better. The clothes are bright, have pushed me from the background and have given me a confidence I have never had before... I am embracing bold colors, skull designs, Buddha (a BIG deal in my religious family) and other racially identifying designs. I've been told I wear my heart on my sleeve at times. Now, I wear all kinds of emotions on my "sleeves!" Title of runner gladly accepted!

Detroit is my Litmus test. Last year, I was undertrained & knew it going in. I did it, anyways. It was my worst marathon to date-- however, considering how "broken" I was, I am proud I finished. I am optimistic for this year. Training is going better.

 

I am being asked to man the Detroit expo-Glass City marathon booth! That would be cool! I'm booth nervous & excited! I'm not sure what this entails; but, I am willing to help & gain experience. I am hoping not to man the booth, solo.

 

I wish I wasn't the only runner in my house. It gets lonely being excited about this stuff by myself. No one else understands my pre-race jitters, my desire to plan, the deciding of a race because of race bling, the love-hate feeling at the start line & wanting to avoid late nights... It gets lonely pounding miles, solo... but I am grateful I receive no opposition, either...

 

So-- I plan Detroit. I plan Woodstock. I plan Glass City... other 5K's & 1/2 marathons that come up are extra bling...

 

The race schedule is shaping up. Miles to go...

The Glass City Marathon race results came in the mail, this week. There was an article about the ambassadors, that I appreciated... but I REALLY wanted to run, this year. A fluke/ random/accidental kicking of footstool while visiting family took me out of the game for two months-- right BEFORE this race. --I ended up course marshaling instead of racing this year. I was quite heart broken. My sister lifted my spirits when she offered to come course marshal with me. We cheered, directed runners, cow belled, musicated the air, hugged runners, high-5'ed and overall laughed. In reflection, if anyone was going to help me feel better-- my sister was a great antidote. She's younger than me but as she tells everyone: "She's taller & cuter."

20 miler on the schedule, yesterday-- I only made 18. I held out for a good (for me pace) for 10 miles... then slowed a bit. By 13-14 I was thirsty for water & only had Tailwind drink in my Camelbak. (I seriously need a new hydration pack where I can carry both.) I walk ran then walked. At mile 16, I passed the section of trail I was going to take for a mile then back for my 20. I just kept walking. Jim came out on his bike & thankfully had water. I slurped then lady-like burped.

I started my run, solo. I'm used to it. When I reached the turn around point, the sun was still low, behind me. I saw my shadow with bouncing, swaying ponytail. I smiled knowing I wasn't "alone". I was running with my shadow! Then I thought I was crazy because I personified an inanimate object... Such is "monkey brain" during a run. I quickly moved on to other subjects in my mind.

A cat came from the underbrush & kept me company for awhile then disappeared. I saw a snake & the usual chipmunks, squirrels, birds, butterflies, dragonflies, wild flowers & miscellaneous jewel toned bugs.

I didn't earn this picture, yet. This was me at mile +17. I was still thinking I may run (walk) past my van for a mile, then back. I didn't. --I wouldn't skip eating on race day. I don't know why I thought I could do it, yesterday. Part of me was confident in Tailwind drink and wanted to experiment before race day. I know, now-- stick to morning food, Tailwind for nutrition... bring water... take caffeine with more calories!

 I'll try again next week. Slow miles at the end but I live to tell the tale & run another day...

7 mile run, yesterday. I'm biting at the bit to get out there, today; but I have to get some work done in my office before I head out to work. I'm trying to "rest" before tomorrow.

Long run, tomorrow-- I have butterflies-- as usual. My INKnBURN clothing helps me put on my game face. It gives me a confidence that I didn't have before... I have Tailwind to keep me powered through my miles & Newtons to protect my tootsies. I know I can do it & still doubt if I can do it. I picked tomorrow for a long run, as the weather will be a bit cooler than Friday or any time over the weekend.

This is what happened, yesterday. It was a surprise & a great story, afterwards. :) The trails are adventurous & enjoyable- always-- despite bugs, thorns, mud or downed trees.

I have two big races this Fall & both will take a toll. I have my first 50K ultra trail run in September. I haven't signed up "officially". I have my hotel room and have the date set aside but I am scared. *Butterflies just typing this* I also have a road marathon in Detroit- less miles but pounding pavement for 26.2 miles is tough... I have my registration and room, already, for Detroit. In the meantime, I prepare by running on both terrains.

I "should be" and "could be" doing more but that is always the case. I'm in a better place than I was, last year in my training.

I have things in place that I didn't have EVER before-- I am nervously optimistic...

I love when people honestly express their mental transformation as well as their struggle with trying to learn to run.

When I first heard about this woman on the news, I wasn't impressed or thrilled with her actions of taking selfies with unsuspecting male runners. Then I learned her story:

Her story episode #1:  Run Selfie Repeat 1

 

Her story episode #2: Run Selfie Repeat 2

I learned I was good at art "late" in high school. I had a great teacher that helped me accomplish a lot in 3 years. I "knew nothing" about papers, charcoal, different types of paints, pencils, etc. I eventually started accumulating my own supplies. As we had kids, I hoped they would be artistic & I vowed to expose them to everything I had- supply wise. I even bought them their own easels! They're still in their boxes-- waiting.

I LOVE seeing our girls, now. All the suggestions I gave... to "try" different mediums fell on deaf ears-- BUT-- just having the supplies available to them was an invitation. Hannah is more adventurous than Jillian. She asked if she could do a watercolor this week. Absolutely!!! I've been stock piling for such an occasion! While her subject matter isn't what I would have chosen, it's tight, bright and fabulous so far. Jillian is still attached to pen & pencil --but taking college art classes this year-- we'll see what she dabbles in...

I took them to Michaels's craft store yesterday for some puppet supplies for Hannah. We walked out with art books, face paint, marionette supplies, paint & pens. --Love me a couple of artsy girls!

Took the girls to the mall, yesterday. I love spending time with them. While we went to take some copper mugs to get engraved, Hot Topic was high on the priority list for a visit, too. We got a few items for school & some sugar skull Star Wars stickers for me. We looked through a few more stores ranging from Disney to Aeropostales. As we "splurged" and actually ate in the food court, we had some serious & not so serious conversations... I look forward to those moments.

On the car ride home- just to keep them talking, I explain the puppy I saw the other day- a small, puffy Husky- on a leash with two young boys. I explain how he was sniffing & tugging on the leash.

Seeing Hannah had her headset on, I ask her: "What would you have named it if it was your dog, Hannah?"
(Rather irritated that I interrupt her music, she takes off her headset. I repeat the question & she graciously plays along with the conversation.) H: "That depends. Are you talking a grown dog or a puppy? I have a name; but what would you name it, first?"
Me (blurting without hesitation a ridiculous answer): "Huskers"
--silence--
Jillian: "And this is why we don't consult you..."
We all laughed & discussed appropriate puppy names for gray dogs (Gandalf the Gray), large & small dogs (Mort) and pugs... :)

As long as they can talk to me about "anything", I hope they will...

I am not a "baby" person. Some people LOVE babies. In my opinion, they are a lot of work with little "payback" & little sleep! When the girls started interacting with us & they were able to communicate with me- even slightly- I started falling in love with them.

As they become young teens, I enjoy seeing the world from their perspective. They certainly have more opportunities than I had at their age. I enjoy their company and I enjoy laughing & working with them.

I say they are good people, not as a biased mom, but as an honest, frank person. I look forward to seeing what they become.

 

Commemorative pictures of me & Lucy running in the rain. There was a time I HATED running. Then when I was running, I HATED running in the rain. I didn't like dogs, either, couldn't stand people that took selfies & would NEVER wear skulls!!! -Now, running in the rain is playtime, Lucy is my always up for a trek running buddy, selfies are my documentation & skulls are new to the wardrobe...

Last night, when I was at work, Jim took the girls to county judging for their Hunting-Wildlife projects. Both got a blue ribbon- meaning their books were filled out well & completely. They each met standards (went past minimum standards) of meeting requirements, demonstrations, community service, leadership skills and learning activities. A county representative will be selected to represent Fulton county. It may be one of our girls-- or not-- but this is the first year they've competed against each other in the same age group. We will be supportive whomever is picked.

Today Hannah went to get her puppet project judged. This was a whim of a project "just to try". Hannah is a great fabricator & very creative. She immediately chose marionettes. She researched history, influence, etc. I was surprised to learn entire operas were dedicated to marionettes in the 18th century. Puppets could perform acts on stage that were deemed inappropriate for human actors. I always learn from their 4-H projects! -As I suspected, she did extremely well & came out with a blue ribbon. It seemed there was no one competing in that project so I'm guessing that's an automatic county winner.

As for Jillian's sewing project, sadly, we will not finish that by judging, tomorrow. We've been a bit busy planning National Shooting Competitions & college entrance. We didn't finish it early... but we have until September for our own county fair.

I am so happy to have the girls in 4-H. We've kept busy over the summer & have done activities as a family.

Waiting for county results then we may plan a state fair trip...

 

4 painfully slow trail miles with Lucy. She loves to be out but it's too warm for her to keep up... Her runs are limited to under 5, in the shade, on cooler days.

My feet are still tender from Saturday's long run. While it's "coming back", it still hurts. This is probably the best I've felt, any year training. I am doubtful and hopeful of this year's races.  It is a strange thing when you've been fighting a broken state for so long... and suddenly someone fixes what is wrong. I want to be optimistic but now I question what my potential is. This is new territory to me.

My body was on the trail but my mind is on my list of tasks. Being responsible to guide a young person's entire future is a weight! I question if I'm the right person to help our girls; yet, I know no one loves and cares for them more. I have their best interests at heart and I do my best to help my husband and girls. I still want to curl up at times but that doesn't help anything.

I contemplate Jillian's college schedule as I think of her personality, her disposition, the college success coach's words, the high school counselor's concerns... Why can't this just be easy...?

I contemplate tomorrow's run and the increase in miles, this week. I will switch to miles on the Yellow Trail. I'm ready.

Jim tells me I "don't like people." It's not that I don't like them, I have a hard time TRUSTING.

I've seen marriages fail-- not because they didn't claim to "love" the other person... but because they didn't love the other person MORE than themselves.

I don't trust imperfection. I worry that another person may love their own desires over the needs of their neighbor- specifically, my children. I don't trust that any person entrusted to watch my children has pure motive of their well being, all of the time. They couldn't... they're imperfect. Our children have also inherited this imperfection. It is my responsibility as a parent to protect, prepare & raise a responsible person. Usually raising a responsible person requires attention and praise. At other times this requires admonition & discipline. Always tempered with empathy and respect...

As I read about gun control, I think of this fundamental issue. I see people so bent on their own desires and "rights" they can be down right demeaning or bull-headed. -Controlling guns is not the basic issue. I see genocides being performed in Africa with machetes. Does one rally for machete control? In the Bible, Cain killed his brother by bludgeoning him with a rock or stick. Does one rally to ban rocks? -Where there is an evil desire, someone will plan with what is available to them.

While I do not advocate "for" the 2nd amendment & the NRA, I have benefitted from their existence. I do have guns readily available and my family knows how to shoot. We do not use them as "weapons" (against others) because we have been morally taught to respect life. On the flip side, would I use my pistol against another person in a life or death situation? I hope never to find out...

In an ideal world, I would trust my children's pure motives & others' motives, as well... but we don't live in an idealistic world.

I do not believe the glass is half full or half empty. I believe YOU fill your own glass with your own works... Some allow their "glass" to become empty and complain. Others demand or cry that they want others to make their glass "fuller". Some have more than they could ever fill their glass with and still desire "your" glass.

I dream of a fair world where others freely share and I don't have to worry of an ulterior motive other than what is stated. I am blunt when I meet people. I am not "rude" but (if I speak) I plainly lay out my intentions. Some call this wearing my heart on my sleeve. I call myself a guarded heart. If I speak, I will be direct. I speak plainly to my children and my husband. I speak "plainly" when I say 'I wish I could trust.'

Much would have to change on the world scene before I could relax... and lower my guard...

 

I was very proud of Jim, today. 1st of all I appreciated him being out there with me. I usually don't mind the first few miles... but as the miles go on, it's nice to have company.

The bike trails were busy with bikers, walkers, runners, skaters & a momma turkey with her 7 babies. (No photo) :( Jim stayed close until I ran out of gas toward mile 13. He got off his bike & ran with me, pushing his bike. Our pace was slow as I took walking breaks, then jogged... but it was good for both of us. I told him he was doing a "brick" work out. Triathletes train by biking then running in one work out session. I sensed a smile. 

16 miler in the books. Hills this week then 18, next week. Today wasn't pretty but I feel it all coming back.

The new Newtons are wonderful! NO BLISTERS, hotspots, sore feet-- at ALL! I would have to tape my feet incessantly in my Brooks, Asics or Saucony on any run 6 miles or more. Newtons have my feet baby soft with no blisters even after a 16 miler! YAY!

Still trying nutrition options but Tailwind & now, Honey Stinger waffles seem to work well for me. A bit "drier" than choking down a gel but no gagging gels, either. They sat in my gut well. --It's a learn as you go, thing.

I knew what my plans were this morning & my old "I CAN'T" mentality was powerful. "It's only 6. I did 14 a few days ago... But these are hills- lots of hills... I want to curl up & stay home. It will be good practice for Cleveland. It's a lot less than 16, later, this week! I 'can't..."
I got myself ready & headed out. The 1st three miles were pretty awful. I was foggy, clumsy, nothing felt natural or easy. I had taken 3 puffs of inhaler & was still having trouble breathing.... I just couldn't sync up. I thought about stopping after mile 3 but knew I'd kick myself, when home for not sticking with it. --Then something wonderful happened. I woke up. Even though I was warm because of the weather, my muscles warmed up. I thought of my upcoming races & played them through my mind. I planned my nutrition & decided which hydration vest I am finally getting. Before I knew it, the horrible hills were done. I know they will make me a stronger runner. I walked as I needed to but ran as much as I could. I felt accomplished & stopped at our local bike shop on the way home. Julie is the owner & was working, today. She is also an Ironman. She qualified & participated in Kona. We talked nutrition & I bought some single flavors of a lot of different items-- just to try different things. I've heard good things about Honey Stinger waffles-- wow! Yummy!!! Definitely packing these on my ultras! Lots more flavors & goodies to try.

What started as a mentally weak run finished with a feeling of accomplishment. I "rewarded" myself with a compliment, some nutrition samples & a new pair of sunglasses!

16 mile run, yet, this week. I'll do a lot less hills, then.

 

Jillian absolutely wanted to take one class at high school- marine biology (an elective). Other than that ALL of her other classes will be at UT, next year.

Each class she takes saves us about $1500-$2000 a CLASS. Why take a math class her junior year of high school then AGAIN in college & pay for it? It only makes sense to take those introductory classes, now. -Hannah's interest is perked because Jillian will be taking her art classes at the Toledo Museum of Art. Hannah flipped & said, "I WANT TO DO THAT!" (I want her to do that, too!)

It was the plan since we found out about it in elementary school: college classes her junior & senior year. Anthony Wayne has a program that if Jillian gets on the honor roll throughout high school, her freshman year's tuition at UT is waived! --While this has been the financial plan, I was SHOCKED that it came to fruition, today. We have more planning, like her placement testing for math & a driver's license... *gulp*

--Things are moving ahead. --We officially have a Rocket!

PURE AWESOMENESS!!!

Western States Endurance Run- 100 mile trail run- oldest finisher, Gunhild Swanson at age 70! Watch her sneak in under the cut off time of 30 hours.

Western States Endurance Run -oldest finisher- GUNHILD SWANSON

3 miles on the training schedule. I started with a novice schedule to accommodate my foot healing, but am now incorporating the long runs of an ultra training schedule. So far so good; but three seems insulting, anymore. I decided to make it three miles of hill repeats. --Ummm yeah... I remembered my first hill session all to well. Hill repeats are the only "speed work" I mindlessly know how to do. It's a love-hate thing...

As we settle at home, I think of what we accomplished this past week. Team Ohio is still a young team with limited resources & kids. Over the past 4 years, however, word has gotten out of what has been resurrected. For the first time in (???) decades, Team Ohio may have all disciplines filled, next year- recurve to muzzle loading & everything in between. For the first time ever, there are waiting lists to be on teams. For the first time, we may have qualifying meets to be on the team. ...The adults & coaches worked so hard this week to give these kids the opportunity-- all worked for FREE & spent much of our own money in support. Jim & another mom woke up SUPER early, every day to make breakfast for everyone. As soon as everyone left, they started lunches & organized to have them delivered to the various teams at different locations, at different lunch breaks. After that was done, they started dinner & breakfast prep for the next morning! They were amazing! I washed dishes, chopped & bagged whatever was needed to help. Another family stepped up to plate & delivered some amazing food as well. All took a load running kids & items whenever necessary. We're still in infancy but gaining experience, momentum, qualified coaches and talented kids. We have our eye on the podiums, soon... -I am so incredibly proud of the team effort. Last year was our first year to Nebraska. I met strangers & went home with friends. I drove out with 2 kids & came home loving more kids than I thought possible. This year, I made room for a few more. Not an easy feat for 2 "overly protective" parents to start socializing, again. I see good things on the horizon for Team Ohio as well as our family stepping more out of our comfort zone.

Things are getting organized & a bit more serious...