This past week & weekend was no different. I wrote about my training lows, complained about the heat & rejoiced over training highs- however brief they were. I wrote about Mirna on Facebook. I was mad that someone verbally attacked her. I was sticking up for her when I was hit with an avalanche of feedback. This wasn't about running. It was a verbal attack on her physical appearance, her person, her abilities and efforts.
My Facebook comments connected to this video: "Dang! This just REALLY upsets me. It's hard enough being the only color in a white sport. It's hard for me having "no waist" in a sport where lean is pristine. She is TRYING. She's not sitting on her a$$. (I'm sorry to use such language but seriously!!!) Give credit where credit is due! She has done longer distances than I have! You don't think she wants to lose more weight-- if anything, to be better at the sport she loves? She doesn't need harsh condemnation. She's putting her money where her mouth is. She's a process & I guarantee getting leaner will happen.
I related to her saying that she came from a family where exercise was "foreign" to her. This was my background as well. It's hard to start with that deficit but it does show that anyone can get results. Some are genetically gifted. Some of us are fighting an uphill battle-- but we ARE battling.
Give her some damn credit! (Again- excuse my language but this REALLY pisses me off! Excuse me, again.) Praise the effort & the results will come."
I was enraged. If a person would attack her, it wouldn't take much for them to attack me & the rest of us "trying."
Some of us already have the negative, doubting voices in our head. Running proves that we can overcome just about anything! "Overcoming" is relative to ourselves. Our body is a gift & deserves respect any time it works! If there is ONE thing I learned from Jim's illness, it's this: when something attacks your body & it stops working, there is nothing you want more than to do "normal" things that you once took for granted- sitting up, moving without assistance, going to the bathroom by yourself, walking, BREATHING, eating... If you "work", then be grateful. If you can walk or run--> at whatever pace you have on any given day, your body deserves applause. Put on blinders & ear plugs to idiots & quiet the voice in your head. I would be cheering others' advancements, why not my own? Why am I criticizing my best effort at that time? I've learned that I need to be merciful with myself & my abilities.
When I started running, I was racing at 10 min miles. I was told that wasn't running. "9 min miles was running." I hit 9 min miles then the SAME person said it wasn't running. "I heard 8 min miles was 'running'." I hit 8 min miles & 7 min miles. Silence from "the definer" - no praise. Then I realized the definition of running/jogging/trotting is all relative. The person that touts a 6 min mile is JOGGING (dirty runner word) compared to an elite. My 10 minute mile is what my trim, once sickly husband is aspiring to- and getting there. Considering being completely bed ridden, a person's body "working" & "participating" IS WORTH AN AWARD. "Running" isn't defined by PACE. It's defined by effort. My 5K, all out 7 min mile running, is nothing compared to elites. But a 7 min mile is gloriously incredible to ME! AND-- Guess what? I still do my long runs at +10 minutes.
This past weekend, I did a long run on Saturday & a 5K on Sunday. I said I wasn't going to race. I hadn't been doing speed work & the weather was not favorable to a PR. As walkers lined up at the FRONT of the start line, I moved farther & farther ahead. They joked that I could go around them despite the announcer telling walkers to let the runners start ahead of them. I caught myself thinking I was "faster." I was irritated- not that they were participating- but irritated that they refused to follow instructions for the benefit of safety and logistics of the large crowd. The gun went off & I felt good. My breathing was fast & I checked my pace on my Garmin. It said I was at a 5:57 pace! I KNEW I couldn't hold that for the entire race. I also knew it was hot (I had been standing in the sun waiting for the start) & I did NOT want to get hurt before Chicago. I tried to slow down for the next couple of miles. As I got home looking at numbers, I see that I hit a 5:14 pace! I have NEVER done that! I didn't stay there long. This wasn't a mile race. I would have two more miles after the first! While I was momentarily jubilant at seeing a 5 minute pace, I was scared. I slowed WAY down. Mile one was a sub 8. Miles 2 & 3 were sub 8:30's; then, I finished at a 7:15 pace kick to the finish. At one time I would have been ecstatic with that performance. I found myself critiquing negatively at my final time. I focused on hitting a 5 minute pace-- however brief-- then reigning myself back in. There was a time I would have walked. I didn't. I WANTED to-- I didn't. Small triumphs are mental confidence boosters IF you give yourself credit. 
Sometimes we advocate for & applaud others, like Mirna, noted above. Sometimes we can destroy ourselves the way her attacker did. As enraged as I was, I realize I am just as guilty- to myself & others, albeit not verbally. We are all a work in progress. -Praise the effort & the results will come...
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