I started freaking myself out, today. I was supposed to run 8, yesterday. I was scared. I procrastinated. I bailed. I postponed it until today. Today arrived & I started freaking out, again. WHY? I don't know. I KNOW I've easily done this mileage before... why is TODAY any different? --I procrastinated & Jim got me out the door. He was going to try to run his 1/2 mile loop around Mallard Lake then bike. I went with the idea that I would do 4. We started separately & I turned around. If he had a great run, or a terrible one, I "should" be there. To be this close in proximity & not support his effort would be a jerk moment. We started from the truck, went through the parking lot & around the lake. I am the wingman & stay to his left, behind him, letting him set the pace. As we rounded the first corner, I waited for him to walk. He didn't. He went up a small incline. Sometimes he walks shortly after, he didn't. It took everything I had to be quiet & not make a big deal about this. As we went up a bigger incline & descended, I remember (every time) how scared I was when Jim tried to unsteadily walk this route. He had absolutely NO muscle left after his last hospital stay. He was emaciated & had very little stamina & energy. Now, here we were, whatever the pace, we were doing this incline with stamina & better footing. As we made it around 1/2 of the lake, I prepared what I would say to coach him to the finish. I didn't have to! He had a constant pace, over the bridge, to the finish, up the stairs, through the parking lot & back to his truck. 1 1/2 minutes faster than anything he has done so far! He had enough in the tank to do a second loop, but we will do that, next time. He got his bike & went for a ride- his fastest, ever.

I did my last 3 1/2, solo,  for my full 4 miles. My head games are my biggest obstacle. I know this. I think of everything I should be doing or a reason why I'm not "talented". I think of the Bumblebee defying odds... I stop for pictures of my hard working, soul-mate creature. As I wait for Jim to return to the truck, I think of a fellow Toledo Roadrunner with ALS who WISHES she could do what we are doing. I share the pictures I took during my stop with her on FB. When I was done, I considered how foolish I was to consider bailing.

If I can get Jim's miles up... then I'll never really have an excuse to bail, again. :)