I "raced", today. Cleveland races are always challenging to this flat lander. I went in viewing this as mileage for training, more than a race. The weather was 79 degrees with 99% humidity at 5AM. I knew I may walk-- I did. I was hoping not to, but made it to mile 7 before walking. I walk-ran to the finish. I realize that I need to ramp my road mileage & add another running day or I'm never going to be happy with my race times. I'm doing enough to finish races but not enough do "well" during longer distances.

I saw a sign on the Internet, today (which prompted this blog post) saying: "World's Okayest Runner." It's true. While I embraced the fact that I am able to do more than I could during my teen years, I'm tired of that thought.  I've tried to inspire non-runners to see that  the sport is possible for anyone. Now, some of the people I've encouraged  have "passed  me." I am happy for anyone that improves-- really-- but the mom in me wants the world to be "fair." I want running to be naturally easy for me, too. If I start running before them, shouldn't my advancement be linear as well? At less than 5 feet tall, I never thought of playing basket ball. It wasn't what I was handed in the genetic "cards." I'm cool with it. Running however-- it's a hard pill to swallow when you "want it" & others genetically have the cards (gait, biomechanics, foot strike, etc) that naturally make the sport easier for them. While I KNOW this, my heart still hurts. You can call it jealousy-- because it is in every aspect of the  definition of the word. Busting my butt will  yield me being "average". I don't get emotional over much-- but for this, I'm desirous. As I reflect on most women my age, I realize that physically, I'm not average-- so the battle in my head continues: change what I can, work with what I have & be content... or try harder to change it.

So, one race humbled me & emboldened me. This story is going to get interesting...