Swimming: yep, I went. We started with with a board & kicking. Tiring but I did it. She reminded me to relax. I was kicking too much & too "tight". I needed to "relax" between each kick. I was also focused too much on kicking "up" instead of kicking "down". -Noted- 

As I've said many times, I have to think about relaxing in the water. We quickly moved back to free style. I had to do my mental checklist: hands straight out in front of me, thumbs in, thumbs down... blah, blah, blah... On my last lesson she noted that I was releasing my breath in "bursts". Teacher: "Why are you doing that? I just tried it. It's hard & I don't like it... at all..." Me: (Not even realizing I was doing it) "I don't know." -At this lesson, I did the same thing. She addressed it, again. "Why don't you breathe out of your mouth, too?" Me: (comparing everything to running & picturing my mouth slightly open while running-- always) "What?!" (I was wondering how I would keep the water from getting into my mouth.) Teacher: "You exhale. Blow bubbles- like this." She proceeds to show me how it looks when she exhales just through her nose & then through mouth & nose. --I was dumbfounded. Only a newbie WOULDN'T know that! **Newbie = ME** As I put this new revelation into the rotation of OTHER revelations to remember while swimming, I had a revelation. I couldn't get far in my (one) lap because I was still exhaling when I turned to my side for air. This meant I was only getting a PARTIAL breath & a panicked feeling when my face was BACK in the water. I felt like I couldn't breathe! As I tried exhaling through my mouth in the water, I was free to get an easy-full- breath when I turned to my side. I went farther & didn't feel panicked "during". I also "slowed" during my strokes & kicking since I didn't feel like I was DROWNING! It WAS a revelation; but, I reverted, quickly. She asked why. "Can we please remember that I JUST learned this new technique 10 minutes ago?" We both laughed. My teacher also addressed treading water. We discussed kicks, relaxed muscles vs tight muscles in the water & how they affect buoyancy. My natural buoyancy level is at my forehead. It appears that I will need to learn how to tread water! Ugh! Let me get a little more relaxed before this wallflower moves away from the pool wall! When I was done with my lesson, I called Jim. I told him about my new found nugget of swimming gold. It was NOT a new concept to him. I told Jillian when I got home. She laughed. It wasn't a new concept to the child I put in swim lessons at four years old, either. --Well, it was to ME. 

I'm sharing this information because ONE: my teacher is awesome & picks up on things I can't even explain WHY I'm doing. She said anxiety causes people to hold on to an air reserve. It's natural. It's why when people learn the pressure is "off", they sigh & exhale. In essence, I was doing the same in swimming. I was releasing my breath in spurts, trying to hold on to a reserve. How did she SEE that?! She saw it because she's AMAZING, is attentive and cares! She addresses my form but also gives me ANSWERS that appeal to my over thinking brain. ;)

The other reason I am so frank with my training is because I WAS a closet runner... & initially a (trying) closet swimmer. I find by sharing information, fellow wallflowers approach me & tell me their stories. They're secretly wanting to do the same thing. Seeing someone else FRANKLY start a new endeavor reminds us that it's not that far out of reach. It's not impossible. If people see there is a struggle- but advancement-- & I didn't die-- they are emboldened to try too. My red, sputtering, running face or soggy swim-hair is an "OK" to have a red face, too. It's OK not knowing the answer & learning as you go. It IS a very vulnerable feeling- learning something new. Seeing someone ahead of you & knowing what to expect is half of the fear "removed." A chuckle along the way is good, too. The reward when you conquer fear is pretty liberating!


After my swim lesson, I did errands & got a few things done at home. My work schedule has changed so that I have Tuesday evenings off from work. Marathon in Training starts next week & last night was a meet & greet. We assembled at The Maumee Indoor theatre. There were coaches & members. We heard about the program, the directors, the track work outs, the long run logistics. We discussed races, met each pace team, received gear & filled out questionnaires. I asked Jim to come with me. He did. I was planning on quietly observing when I saw one of my daughter's previous teachers. She waved across the theatre. I "quietly" waved back in a way that probably seemed "cold". I was being a wallflower, again. At the end of the meeting, I looked up enough to see another teacher! (They were both sitting in the row in front of us. Jim pointed them out-- duh!) We talked about our own goals & what we want from the program. These teachers are also newbies to the program, like me. They are younger than me... but we're all "in the same boat." 

I have NO IDEA if my running goal is too grandiose. I don't think it is. I'm serious, this year. I don't think my swimming is out of reach, anymore, either. I don't foresee I'll be ready for any Tri, anytime soon-- but I'm more confident in the possibilities than ever before. I'm putting money into these goals, this year; &, I want results. The results will come OUT depending on how much I put IN to it. I'm ready...