Jul 06, 2016
Below are questions (& my responses) to an interview about Jim's ordeal. It was very strange reliving the 8 month experience & summarizing it in a few paragraphs. I was so focused on tasks, that I rarely cried. I was frustrated & a few times cried from frustration. I felt hatred, once. I remember it CLEARLY. Truly fearful?
I can't remember. Sadness wasn't an accurate description of any day. Emotions ranged from frustration to anger. There was a calmness to organizing the daya false sense of control, I suspect. Now, there is true joy- not a superficial happiness. I am genuinely grateful to be alive & have my family, together.
Q: Has your passion for running and strength training played a part? If so, how?
A: When Jim came home, I was waiting on him constantly. He couldn’t sit up, eat, monitor his insulin (he was now diabetic) or change his bandages. My training became secondary to running a household but my running kept me sane. It was time that altered my mood. I was able to temporarily put down the weight of trauma & leave it in the woods. I was able to pick up responsibilities after a shower. As I think about it, I’m not sure how we did it. We just juggled the best we could.
Q: What wishes do you have for those of your family?
A: I want our girls to see a happy couple as an example if they choose marriage, someday. A couple working & exercising, together, is a great thing to witness. I want our girls to finish school & college. I want my husband to be happy & healthy. I was told that this ordeal would bring us closer together as a family. At the time, I thought it was a HORRIBLE thing to say. The stress of watching the girls try to function at school knowing their dad may die was difficult. Wondering if he would survive & adjustments that would need to be made, afterwards, were daily concerns. Now, he’s been to hell & back. Daily life seems less dramatic. -We fought, defended & survived. We depended on each other & we share the same wounds. We cried & cheered, together. Dying & surviving, together, HAS brought us closer together as a couple & a family. The doctors said Jim’s strong heart & lungs (from running) were key to his survival. I hope this story “pays it forward”. For whatever reason a person’s future looks bleak… you just can’t give up. As long as your heart is beating & you’re breathing (on your own or with assistance), you just keep hoping & fighting…
I questioned if Jim would give up during any of this ordeal. I can't imagine the fear, pain & discomfort when he woke up to a giant tube down his throat & numerous tubes in arms, thighs & neck. He was quite awake when they removed the vent tube that went down his esophagus. He had lucid dreams from the strong narcotics given him. It took awhile to convince him that many of the experiences he thought were real, weren't. He believed he had been kidnapped. He told stories that now seem far fetched to him... but we're quite real in his mind.
We pick up the pieces, now & live our altered life. We are different people. After being so close to death, life is much easier...
Q: Has your passion for running and strength training played a part? If so, how?
A: When Jim came home, I was waiting on him constantly. He couldn’t sit up, eat, monitor his insulin (he was now diabetic) or change his bandages. My training became secondary to running a household but my running kept me sane. It was time that altered my mood. I was able to temporarily put down the weight of trauma & leave it in the woods. I was able to pick up responsibilities after a shower. As I think about it, I’m not sure how we did it. We just juggled the best we could.
Q: What wishes do you have for those of your family?
A: I want our girls to see a happy couple as an example if they choose marriage, someday. A couple working & exercising, together, is a great thing to witness. I want our girls to finish school & college. I want my husband to be happy & healthy. I was told that this ordeal would bring us closer together as a family. At the time, I thought it was a HORRIBLE thing to say. The stress of watching the girls try to function at school knowing their dad may die was difficult. Wondering if he would survive & adjustments that would need to be made, afterwards, were daily concerns. Now, he’s been to hell & back. Daily life seems less dramatic. -We fought, defended & survived. We depended on each other & we share the same wounds. We cried & cheered, together. Dying & surviving, together, HAS brought us closer together as a couple & a family. The doctors said Jim’s strong heart & lungs (from running) were key to his survival. I hope this story “pays it forward”. For whatever reason a person’s future looks bleak… you just can’t give up. As long as your heart is beating & you’re breathing (on your own or with assistance), you just keep hoping & fighting…
I questioned if Jim would give up during any of this ordeal. I can't imagine the fear, pain & discomfort when he woke up to a giant tube down his throat & numerous tubes in arms, thighs & neck. He was quite awake when they removed the vent tube that went down his esophagus. He had lucid dreams from the strong narcotics given him. It took awhile to convince him that many of the experiences he thought were real, weren't. He believed he had been kidnapped. He told stories that now seem far fetched to him... but we're quite real in his mind.
We pick up the pieces, now & live our altered life. We are different people. After being so close to death, life is much easier...
It does make you take stock of your life, doesn't it?
ReplyDeleteShows you what is truly important.
I don't wish this on any creature- human or animal. It does make me realize that most of the stuff I worried about is out of my hands, anyways. You do what you "can" & hope for the best.
ReplyDelete